Of Love and Loss
by whumpqueen
Summary: After Miracle Day Torchwood is rebuilt but what happens when a few old friends join up and a spaceship crashes in Cardiff and Jack is faced with his memories. Disclaimer I don't own Torchwood. Read and please please please review. on hiatus cause i lost the inspiration and the mood of the piece. UP FOR ADOPTION
1. Chapter 1

The blowfish pushed her over the railing without warning. She landed on her arm with a sickening crunch. Gwen knew immediately that her arm was broken but got up and went after the annoying creature.

She had landed only one level down from where she had been in the car park.

As she rounded the corner to where she had just been she was greeted by the sight of her team mate Andy being held at gun point, with his own gun…again. She sighed and wondered when Andy would learn to keep hold of his weapon better; this was the third time this had happened since he started working with Torchwood two months ago.

She slowly reached for her own gun with her good arm and winced when she hit her arm with her hand. The blowfish saw her movements and discharged the gun in a panic.

Luckily for Andy, the blowfish was a very bad shot and had missed the former police officer completely. By that time Gwen had her gun out and had shot the alien, killing it instantly.

As soon as the blowfish was down Andy retrieved his firearm and went to see if Gwen was alright.

"Seriously Andy, again?" Gwen said looking at him sternly.

"Hey, I'm not the one who got knocked over a railing by a fish. Speaking of which, are you alright?" Andy joked then moved to get a better look at the arm she was cradling.

"Yeah, I think my arm is broken though." Gwen said gingerly moving her arm.

At that moment there was a loud gasp from behind them and Gwen said "Back in the land of the living are we Jack?"

Jack stood up and stretched before saying "Yeah, didn't expect a blowfish to have sonic charges though."

Andy shuddered at his bosses immortality and said "That still freaks me out you know."

Jack just smiled and winked then his eyes landed on Gwen's arm and said "Arm ok?"

Gwen attempted to move it and winced then said "Not really, Rhys is going to kill me."

Jack sighed knowing that it meant another trip to the hospital. He missed having a doctor on staff.

Gwen knew what he was thinking and said "We need a doctor Jack. We can't keep going to the hospital after every mission with strange and mysterious injuries. Someone is bound to find out about us."

Jack knew she was right and took out his mobile to dial a familiar number. He had the perfect person for the job. When a voice on the other end answered Jack smiled and said "Hello Miss Martha Jones."


	2. Chapter 2

Martha entered the Hub and was almost knocked over by Gwen's hug. Gwen began to ramble, trying to catch her friend up on all that had happened since they had seen each other last. She had just gone into a rant about how Rhys refused to change diapers when she noticed the young man standing behind her looking on and laughing at Gwen's antics.

"Who is this?" Gwen asked with a smile.

Martha put her arm in his and said "This is my husband Mickey Smith. Mickey this is Gwen" Mickey and Gwen shook hands then Gwen turned to Martha, her confusion clear on her face. "What happened to Tom?" Gwen asked.

A sad expression crossed Martha's face before she answered "Long story, I'll tell you later." Gwen laid a comforting hand on her friends arm but before she had the chance to say anything Jack burst into the room in his typical Captain Jack style.

"Martha Jones!" he exclaimed, "And Mickey Smith! Or should I say Martha Jones-Smith." Jack pulled the two old friends into a bear hug.

"You know him Jack? And you knew Martha was married and didn't tell me." Gwen said looking hurt.

"I forgot. And I saved the world with this guy once or twice. Remember Margaret the Slitheen, Mickey. Good ol' Margaret Blaine." Jack said slapping Mickey on the back. Mickey laughed at the memories.

"Wait, Margaret Blaine… Margaret Blaine the former mayor of Cardiff? She was an Alien?" Gwen asked stunned at the revelation.

Jack just laughed and pulled Mickey with him to tour the Hub. Martha watched with a smile as her husband and her best friend walked off talking and laughing about times and friends long gone.

Martha turned to Gwen, concern on her face, and asked "How is he?"

Gwen paused, "What do you mean?"

Martha looked at her and said "You know exactly what I mean."

Gwen avoided Martha's eyes; she did know and decided to answer truthfully "I don't know Martha, I really don't know. He seems fine you know, flirting and joking and being well… Jack. But sometimes, sometimes I see him when he thinks no one is looking. I see the pain in his eyes, the despair and loneliness on his face. He feels so alone; I know he does because I would if I were him. I don't think he will ever be ok, I don't think his heart will ever heal, at least not fully."

Martha could see the tears forming in Gwen's eyes and felt for the pain of her two friends. It wasn't easy to watch someone you care for to be so hurt or to lose the one you love and she knew how both of those felt. "He loved him you know, Ianto… More than I think he ever loved anyone, even the Doctor." Martha said softly.

"Yeah," Gwen replied her voice almost a whisper, "the anniversary is next week. It's been a year since he died."

Martha didn't want Gwen to start crying so in a desperate attempt to lighten the mood she said "Let's get that cast off your arm and you can introduce me to the new guy I've heard so much about."

Gwen smiled at Martha then saw Andy and called out "Oi! Andy I got someone here who wants to meet you."


	3. Chapter 3

"Do you miss her?" Jack asked as he walked through the lower levels with Mickey.

"Every day. But she is happy in her alternate universe with her meta-crisis Doctor and all. Besides, I have Martha now." Mickey replied, his voice tinged with a multitude of emotions. For a moment the two men stood and let old memories of a lost friend wash over them.

"We may see her again, you know Rose, stubborn as hell." Jack said with a laugh.

"Don't I know it? She gets it from her mum you know. Good god do those to know how to row." Mickey replied with a groan. Jack broke out into hearty laughter at the thought of Rose and Jackie arguing and the two men made their way back to the main area of the Hub.

As they returned to the main work area Jack saw Andy talking to Martha as she removed Gwen's cast. Jack decided to rescue Martha and said "Well Andy, I see you have met our beautiful Martha. This is her intelligent young husband Mickey Smith. Mickey, Andy. Andy, Mickey. Now with introductions out of the way let's get down to business." Jack said as the rest of the team left the autopsy bay and joined them in the open main area.

Jack led Mickey to an open workstation and continued saying "Mickey this is going to be your workstation. Martha yours is in the same place you know where it is."

Martha nodded then asked "Didn't this place blow up?"

Gwen explained saying "It did but most of the lower levels were untouched so when we rebuilt it was almost exactly the same and we got bored and decided to see if we could remember the layout. We had a competition to see who could remember the most. It's been quiet since the rift was closed." Martha nodded with an understanding smile knowing that they also wanted some sense of normalcy after the loss of so many friends and in the aftermath of recent events.

"Alright Andy, I need that report for UNIT. Martha I got a dead blowfish for you and Mickey I need you to check for any suspicious reports in the area. Gwen you're with me, weevil report in Splott." Jack doled out orders then went to grab his greatcoat when he was interrupted by a loud alarm.

"Is that what I think it is?" Gwen asked turning to Jack. His face was suddenly serious as he rushed over to the closest monitor.

Reports were coming in of radar interference and meteor sightings. Jack ran a quick scan for alien tech and wasn't surprised when he got positive readings but wasn't expecting to come across the mauve alert.

A spaceship was about to crash in the middle of Cardiff.


	4. Chapter 4

The Torchwood team sprang into action. Mickey's fingers flew across the keyboard in a flurry of trajectory calculations and location algorithms. He even attempted to calculate the rate of burn up to see if the ship would break up in the upper atmosphere.

Gwen and Andy grabbed their firearms and began to make their way to the SUV. Martha was close behind grabbing a medical kit on her way to the door.

Jack tossed a coms unit at Mickey before donning his own and saying "Mickey keep me updated and let me know where this thing is going to land." Jack hurried out the door and grabbed a coms unit for Martha with his greatcoat billowing out behind him.

When Jack reaches the SUV he tosses the ear piece at Martha but the second he get in the car Mickey's voice crackles over the communications system. "Jack, don't go anywhere! The ship is headed right for us. It's going to crash in the Plass!"

Jack and Gwen leap out of the SUV and run to the Plass with Martha and Andy on their heels.

Jack frowns as he comes to a stop in the middle of the slightly crowded public area. He turns to his team and doles out orders "Martha, Gwen help me clear this place of civilians. Tell them there is a security risk, a bomb threat or something. Andy, call your old pals at the police and tell them Torchwood is handling this. I do not want any idiot cops showing up guns blazing with a possibly hostile alien crash-landing on our doorstep."

Martha and Gwen took off in opposite directions telling everyone in ear-shot to vacate the premises. Andy pulled out his mobile and began a tedious conversation with the chief of police that contained a bit of cursing and "bloody Torchwood" from the seasoned police chief.

"1 minute until impact." Mickey's voice said over the coms.

Jack's frowned deepened as he saw the number of people still occupying the area. He suddenly noticed the speaker system and said "Mickey can you patch me in to the PA system?"

Mickey smirked and said "Give me five seconds."

Jack began to press buttons on his wrist strap setting of a loud siren.

"Good to go." Mickey confirmed.

Jack lowered the siren and began to talk "Please evacuate the immediate area. There is a possible threat in the vicinity. I repeat please vacate the area. "Jack watched as those still left in the Plass took off running.

Mickey suddenly exclaimed in triumph, "I found it Jack. The ship is cloaked so maybe that lame bomb excuses will cover everything nicely."

Jack laughed, "People are going to start wondering why this place blows up so often."

Just then the ground in the middle of the Plass heaves up and everything begins to shake as if there was an earthquake. There is a loud explosion that sends rocks flying.

Jack is suddenly pinned by a stray bench as it flies through the air and lands across his chest, crushing it and killing him instantly.


	5. Chapter 5

Jack gasped back to life and could still register the pain in his chest. He realized that he still had the bench on top of him and he struggled to push it off.

Gwen, after getting over the initial shock of the blast ran towards Jack and helped to lift the bench from his chest. As Jack sat up he looked over Gwen to make sure she was alright. He noticed a few cuts and bruises but saw that she was alright. He had to check on the rest of his team, he didn't want to lose anyone else.

"Everyone alright?" Jack called over the coms.

He was relived to hear the chorus of yes's that came from his slightly battered team.

He heard sirens in the distance and addressed his team, "Andy take care of that, do not let anyone in here. Martha go help the paramedics. Mickey, monitor the news I want to know what they are saying about this. Gwen, you are with me."

He began to pick his way through the rubble towards the large crater in the center. As he walked away he could hear Andy start to argue with some local authority figures. Jack and Gwen soon reached the edge of the crater.

As they made their way down he warned "Mickey said it was cloaked so watch you don't walk into it face first, Rhys kind of likes your face the way it is and I like mine the way it is."

Gwen laughed at the thought of Rhys punching Jack in the face. Jack chuckled then raised an arm before him as he walked towards the center so as not to run into the craft.

His smile fell as he began to make a mental list of things he prayed that it was not.

The list vanished from his mind the moment his hand touched warm metal. He knew immediately that the warmth was more than heat but it was emotion as well.

He relaxed with the realization that this was the ship of an empath.

He still had no idea what species the creature was or what planet it came from but he knew what the empath had risked to come here. The creature must have known it's ship would no be able to land properly and it had risked the lives of many. For an empath that was the hardest thing imaginable, to cause pain to others and feel it as well, Jack shuddered.

At that moment he felt the presence in his mind, he knew that the others felt it as well when Gwen said "Jack what is going on? Are we being attacked?" she sounded worried. "Don't worry. I know what this is, don't fight it." Jack said attempting to calm her.

Jack saw her trying to calm herself down before he closed his eyes and allowed the being access to his mind.

He could feel the old memories reawakening, some full of love and friends and others heartbreaking and painful.

He began to get the feeling that the creature was searching for something, someone, but who or what he did not know. Jack gasped when it was found, a simple emotion and with it came many faces, faces of those he loved.

The faces whirled through his head at lightning speed but he saw each clear as day; the Doctor, Rose, Estelle, Alice, John, Martha, Alex, Captain Jack Harkness, his mother, Andy, Esther, Gray, Stephen, Mickey, his father, Suzie, Gwen, Angelo, Tosh, Owen… Ianto.

Suddenly the faces froze and the creature grabbed hold of Ianto's. Jack knew it was because of the strength of his love for the Welshman and the bitter closeness of his death, because of love and loss.

Moments later Gwen gasped as she watched Jack disappear before her eyes.


	6. Chapter 6

Jack smiled when he saw the inside of the ship, "Chula, should have guessed." He chuckled softly at the memories it brought back. Memories of war, courage, a girl hanging from a barrage balloon, and an invisible spaceship tied to Big Ben. He thought back to a comment he had made to Rose about parking somewhere you would remember, _guess you can't forget where you parked when it's inside the big freakin hole in the ground_.

He had never met a Chula empath before and didn't think there were any so he wasn't surprised when the pilot turned around and he discovered that the creature was definitely not Chula.

The creature before him was exquisite, he had never seen one before but he had heard of them.

The creature was one of the Louloύdi, one of the flower race. They were called such because of their resemblance to the flowers of earth but Jack saw they were so much more than flowers.

The majority of the Louloύdi was a gorgeous deep dark green like the color of a massive forest with shades of lighter green outlining his sinewy muscles.

Jack knew the creature was male, he wasn't sure how but he just knew as if the creatures identity was explained un the telepathic and empathic aura around him.

Jack looked in wonder at the alien whose arms resembled the vines of the rainforest, thick and strong, with softly curling fingers that looked like new growth. His feet were shaped like leaves and Jack could even see the veins running through them. They seemed to move as gracefully as if they were blowing around in a gentle breeze.

His face was smooth and was a slightly darker green than the rest of him with several petal shaped markings adorning his face that held a dazzling mixture of blues and purples fading into each other like the petals of a flower changing color.

The same colors were present in the magnificent wings the creature possessed. Glorious wings that had a wingspan to rival Myfanwy's, wings that faded into nothingness and flower like water and were not composed of feathers but rather of pure color and light.

"Such memories you have Captain, such emotion and so raw and fresh and ever present even if they are centuries old," the creature intoned telepathically as it had no mouth to speak of.

"You have experienced so much more than the rest of your short-lived kind and not just in the ways of the universe but in the ways of the heart as well. They do not know what it is to have to carry on when all that you love is taken from you time and time again, but you do. You understand my pain, you feel it for the one called Ianto, one who is no more, one whom you loved more than even you know, and one who is still with you and always will be. You have lost so much recently and that is why I know that you are the one I need to assist me in my quest. I deeply apologize for the intrusion of your memories but it was necessary in order for me to deem you worthy."

Jack could feel the heartbreak rolling of the Louloύdi in waves like a tsunami, he did understand. Jack knew he had to help, he couldn't leave one who suffered like he did to that fate for eternity, not when he could fix it, take away the pain and sadness.

"No harm no foul, besides you gave me the chance to see him again, even if it was only a memory. It was beautiful, he was beautiful, and for that I thank you," Jack said composing himself, "Now how can I be of assistance?"


	7. Chapter 7

Gwen stood staring at the empty space where Jack had just been standing and when she finally came to her senses she started yelling into the coms hysterically. "Jack! Jack! Can you hear me? Where are you? Jack!"

The team froze at the level of alarm in Gwen's voice and waited for an answer from their fearless Captain but none came.

Martha broke the long silence by calmly asking "Gwen what happened? Is Jack ok? Is he with you?" Martha closed her eyes dreading the reply she knew the team couldn't deal with this alien without Jack, especially if it had taken him. She also knew Gwen had lost to many friends in the past two years and even though Jack couldn't die the possibility that he had been taken from her scared her to death.

Gwen finally found her voice and said "He's gone! Just gone, disappeared, vanished, poof, abracadabra, presto, gone." Gwen was beginning to hyperventilate and Martha knew she had to calm her down before she could even attempt to get a straight answer.

"Gwen, honey, calm down and breathe. Now tell us exactly what happened." Martha said in her most soothing doctor voice.

"Gwen we need to know what happened." Andy echoed, careful not to push too hard. He knew how Gwen could get when she was in a state like this and he knew it could get ugly if she didn't clear her head.

Gwen took a deep breath and relayed what had happened to her fellow teammates, "He was standing right in front of me. Just two or three feet away, we were trying to find the ship. I think he found it because it he stopped and his hand was resting on something. Then there was this thing, like a presence in my mind. I could feel it moving around in my mind and looking at stuff, at least I think it was. Jack said it was ok then he kind of gasped like when he comes back to life and then he disappeared"

Mickey did a quick check on his computer and said "I'm still reading his vital signs in that area. Gwen tell me, the air around you does it taste…metallic."

Gwen was confused but took a breath and realized that was exactly how the air felt and tasted. "Yeah." She said.

"What are you getting at… Oh! I get it! Teleport! Mickey Smith I bloody love you!" Martha said almost jumping with joy, they could reverse the teleport, they had a few sonic devices that they could use like how Mickey told her the Doctor had the last time he was in Cardiff. Mickey laughed at his wife's antics knowing she had just thought of the story he had told her of Margaret Blaine.

"Umm… can somebody explain this to me?" Andy said still confused.

"Oh sorry. He was teleported onto the ship probably and even if the aliens are hostile we have a way to reverse the teleport and bring him back. I just need to find the right sonic device." Mickey said with a triumphant grin spreading across his face.

Suddenly Jack's voice came over the coms, "No need. Meet me in the conference room in ten. Don't worry the alien is friendly and it's not a trap. Code 55934." Jack said using the code to prove he wasn't lying as it was a safe code used in association with friendly aliens and rift refugees, "Oh and Gwen…Abracadabra? Really?"


End file.
